Things I believe In
Not using hand sanitizer. Gotta keep the germs, cause they make you stronger. Bacteria is good for you.
Eskimos.
People need more wood in their diets (like, actual wood. Once you’re done with that toothpick, eat it).
Duck Tales is the greatest cartoon show ever.
If you’re unsure of something, then the answer is ‘no.’ If it was yes, it you’d know it.
Maintain a cleaning effort of a constant ten percent. If you constantly tidy up and put a small effort into cleanliness, then there will be much less cleaning to do when it must be done.
Time is theoretical, existing only as a human conception.
Coffee, somehow, has to be bad for you.
Facebook is THE DEVIL!
The reason we don’t live in a perfect world is because we can’t all agree on what’s perfect.
The Chris Effect 
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