There’s a great deal of products out there for purchase that I just don’t understand. Life insurance is one of them. This is a product you buy, hoping not to use for a long time, and lose money on when you don’t. Name ANYTHING else that fits that profile that you’d be willing to pay for. They make it a law to buy car insurance – at least if you want to drive a car legally – but no one forces people to buy life insurance. With car insurance, you pay if there’s an accident. With life insurance, you pay if there’s NO accident.
But people buy it. Why? It’s not like car insurance where someone else will fix your car should something happen to it. No one’s going to fix you if you die. All you’re promised is that someone ELSE will get a huge chunk of money. What good does that do? You get nothing. It’s like giving money away. If you spend the money and don’t die, then it’s a waste of money. If you spend the money and do die, then you obviously don’t get anything out of it. Maybe a nice coffin, but a lot of good that will do you. And who’s to say that they’ll even pay up? You’ll be dead, so you’ll never know.
Personally, I think they should give you the money up front, so you can at least see it. And take it with you, and get some use out of it. Besides, if you’re the one paying for it, why shouldn’t you get to have it? F*ck your family; you’re the one who’s gonna die. But I digress, and besides, the system doesn’t work that way.
Now the natural excuse for this expense is that your “loved ones” will get cash if you die. Like that’s really gonna make them feel better about your death. (And if they don’t seem to mind exchanging of your life for cash, then they probably don’t deserve any of it.) You’d probably have to give them a huge windfall of money to take away some of the sting, but that’s just gonna cost you more while you’re still alive. Gotta pay the life insurance scammers more money before you die – money that could be spent elsewhere – so they can give your family more money after you die.
Yes, you could spend the money elsewhere. Why give your family more cash and a better life after you die when you could do that while you’re still alive? This way you get to enjoy it too! Wait, what’s that you say? Your family will get more money from the insurance than you could provide for them during your life? Really? Just how much insurance are you paying for? And what kind of crappy job do you have? Maybe you should get a better job. Or another job. Maybe you should just try harder. Isn’t your family worth it? But no, you just take the easy way out and get life insurance. Your family doesn’t deserve you. Maybe you’re better off dead.
Sorry. This is why I don’t take questions when I write.
Anyway, the way I see it, if you get life insurance, it’s giving your “loved ones” an excuse to kill you. If you’re an alcoholic wife beater then you’d better watch your back. Of course, most alcoholic wife beaters probably wouldn’t have life insurance (or so I’ve learned through the complete lack of research I’ve done for this rant), but I think you see my point. The more insurance you have, the bigger the target on your back is. It’s like a bounty on your head. So it’d be a good idea not to tell anyone you even have the insurance. If the wife asks where all the money is going, claim you have a gambling problem (or if you’re an alcoholic wife beater, shut her up).
You pay each month for what? Peace of mind? You’re losing hard-earned money for someone to say that if something should inflict a temporary state of not living upon you, then they’ll “take care” of your “loved ones.” Yeah, that’d sure put me at ease. It’s really just another bill to pay isn’t it? Death and taxes, right? And the longer you live, the more you pay them. And here’s the kicker; if you live long enough, you might not even break even. Obviously you want to live a long time, so why accept a bill you’ll be paying for the rest of your life. Kinda takes the fun out of living. Almost makes you want to kill yourself. Although, the quicker you die, the less money you have to spend. Hell, you can even turn a profit if your death is “timely.”
Ultimately, my point is that life insurance is like a tax on life. If you live, you gotta pay them. That’s how it works. If you’ve somehow managed to not die this month, you owe them money. Like you’ve lost a f*cking bet. Like it’s your fault you’re still alive. Then again, if you’re willing to actually pay for it, then maybe it IS your own fault.
Now, if life insurance was a guarantee that you wouldn’t die, I’d pay for that.
The Chris Effect 